Compassion

Ever met those people who cry at everything? Like anything happy, sad, just any situation? Well, if you haven't, you actually have. I'm one of those. Yep, I am such an emotional person. I have a lot of compassion and sympathy for people. Which, usually is a good thing. Vince has told me before it's one of the things he loves about me. But, it really is kind of a hassle sometimes. I've stated in previous posts that I feel for people. Like whatever they feel, I feel. Which is biblically what we are supposed to do, but I feel I got too much compassion. Me and Julia cried watching Wife Swap the other day. WIFE SWAP. It's not supposed to be cry-worthy. But, I felt for the people in the situation. I feel like I do that with everything. I can't even watch certain music videos, because I'm bound to cry. Anyways, while I feel sometimes I have too much compassion, I am blessed to even feel it at all. 

"Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn."

-Romans 12:15

Anyways, here's some music videos bound to make you cry...or at least made me cry. If you just want to watch something sweet/sad, and just need to cry. Enjoy :)

Somebody's Hero - Jamie O'Neal

Never Gonna Be Alone - Nickelback

Letters From Home - John Michael Montgomery

Livin' la vida loca!

This is kind of a long post, so I apologize in advance, and if you read it all, thanks :)

This past week/weekend was so bad. There were some good parts, but overall, this was a terrible week. First, there was drama with me and Vince, but we fixed it. The weather has been cray cray, school is overloading, and sorority drama was reaching a boiling point. Luckily, I had a mini break with a WONDERFUL double date with Vince, AJ and Megan. We watched Hunger Games and ate at Ruby Tuesdays. Saturday night was ADX's spring formal. It was supposed to be a good ending to a bad week. But, the worst thing possible happened Saturday. To Daddy.


Daddy's medical history isn't exactly the best. He has such a weak immune system. So, I got a text Saturday around noon from Madison (my real sister) that just said "Called 911. Dad having chest pains". I didn't think much of it at first, since hospital visits are a frequent thing for him. So, I called Mama cause usually 911 isn't involved. She sounded calm, but just said Daddy was weed eating and came inside and fell to the floor with chest pains. Everyone was asleep, except Sawyer. Thankfully, Sawyer woke mama up, because apparently it was bad. So, anyways, Mama cut me off short cause the ambulance got there, but she told me it was probably a heart attack, and she'd call me later. I hung up with her.


A heart attack? That was not expected. I immediately burst into tears. I had sent Vince a text that said what happened, so he came over to console me. I was hysterical. (Props to my awesome roomie, Julia, for the spontaneous hug and making me laugh when it happened) Vince finally calmed me down, and I continued to text Madison about updates. She sent me a few pictures of Daddy on a stretcher, which is so typical of her. So, to get my mind off of things, bless his heart, Vince took me to eat Chinese and get some sweets. We got Chinese to go and ate at his house, and then Madi called me. She said it was a heart attack and it was bad. I started crying again. Vince hugged me til I stopped and kept reminding me people have heart attacks all the time, and he'd be ok.

Since formal was that night, I figured I was probably gonna miss it and be at the hospital. Mom texted me around 2, and said "don't miss formal...have fun. Dad will be ok." If anyone knows my mom, you can't really argue with her. I then sent an email to my ADX sisters telling them what happened and not to bring it up at formal. I didn't want people to worry about how I was and not have fun. So, with the help of Julia, I fixed my hair and makeup and all the formal stuff. I couldn't help but worry about what was happening to Daddy. I was obsessively checking Mama's facebook to see if there were any updates about what was going on, but there wasn't really anything. So, we went to formal. I had a blast. Of course, I couldn't help but check my phone, but nothing new, so I kept dancing and stuff. 


On the way home, I checked facebook and there was a status from mama posted about 5 minutes before I got on. It said Daddy had coded in the ICU. For you non-medical speaking people, like me who had to google it, it means his heart completely stopped. Scary stuff. Naturally, started crying again. Vince was driving from Birmingham, so he just held my hand the whole way home and kept reassuring me it'd be ok. I texted mom and she said he was ok, but scared the nurses. It was so hard to sleep that night. I went to bed around 3 am, but kept waking up every hour or so, and would check my text messages and facebook, just to make sure nothing bad had happened. I was exhausted when I woke up. 


So, on Sunday around 10 am, me and Vince headed back to Chilton County to visit his family and make a hospital visit. Since visiting hours weren't open yet, we went to eat lunch with his family at Golden Corral, then went by the hospital to see Daddy. When we got there, he was laid down in his bed with tons of packets of crackers. He perked up when he saw us, and lifted his bed up to talk to us. (almost cried again when I saw him perk up). He was definitely back to himself, minus the numerous bruises and wires attached to him. My aunt, uncle and cousin came while we were there, so we talked to them for awhile. And daddy says the funniest things. He informed me the only reason we got 3rd place in ADX parents weekend was because he was about to have a heart attack. (smh) So, we stayed awhile, then headed to Vince's house to update them on his condition. 


Today, he was released from ICU, got a normal room, and hopefully gets to come home tomorrow. I am overwhelmed with the amount of texts, facebook posts, and love and prayers we've received through this. Heart attacks are no joke. I was terrified. It definitely made me appreciate what I have and how easily it could be taken away. I'm so thankful Daddy is alive and doing better. 


I also realized how blessed I am to have people that care so much about me. Vince, Julia, Kelsey, Megan, Morgan, Skyler, ect. My list could go on and on. But, I've never felt so much love and prayers. Whether it be taking me to lunch, or just a text saying "I'm praying for you". I am truly grateful for amazing people, and this just continues to prove my friends are the BEST in the world, and can't be replaced. 


I'll end on a happy note. So, here's some pictures from formal... :)

Julia :) the amazing roommate!

Vince, me, Megan, and AJ :)

Me and Vince at formal!

Fabulous E-board :)

Some of my pledge class :)

My pi babies :)

Think before you speak.

I'll be honest, I have a lot of flaws. A LOT. Nothing I'm ashamed of, God made me the way He wanted me to be made. One of mine being I speak before I think sometimes. It gets you in a lot of trouble. It's something I'm slowly working out, but is a real pain in the butt. Once you say something, it's hard to take it back. Once it's said and out there, there's no way to make it not happen. So, friends, I encourage you to think before you speak...
 "My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and to slow to become angry." - James 1:19


Even when we are highly hyper-sensitive, we ALWAYS need to think before we say something we might regret. And even though we want to, don't blame your emotions on saying something. You always have the power to stop yourself and think, we just let our feelings get the best of us sometimes.

la la la whatever

Here's just some random thoughts I'm having...nothing important, except the first one, but only for if you want to propose to me ;)...just kind of what's on my mind right now...


1. FUTURE HUSBAND: if you propose to me before I graduate college, please do it on a Saturday or Sunday. That way I can have a candle passing on Monday, and won't have to keep it a secret so long!
2. After formal, I'm dying my hair DARK. Like, burgundy dark. Can't wait!
3. Speaking of formal, I hope Vince gets to go! His great grandmother might not make it til May, so he may be in South Florida during formal. But, if that's the case, I'll just go solo ;)
4. I'm about to take a nap. My neck is so sore from lack of sleep and the awkward positioning of my pillows. :/ 

Keep calm and Value your Freedom

I'm not sure why I am feeling kinda nostalgic tonight, but I am. Most people don't know this but my father served in the US Army for about 20 years. From age birth til about 12, all I knew was the military lifestyle. Transitioning from military to civilian life was not easy. I mean, there's been harder things for me in life, but it definitely wasn't one of the easiest. Here's a little background on my childhood...

Daddy was active duty all my childhood. As far back as I can remember, he would be deployed overseas for months at a time, usually once every 2-3 years. It wasn't anything unusual for us. I also lived in 4 different states, went to 6 different schools, and lived in 7 different houses all before the age of 11. Then, Daddy got aplastic anemia from serving in Korea and being exposed to different chemicals. When I moved to Jemison in 6th grade, after he was medically discharged, it was hard to cope with. Jemison is a small town where everyone grew up together, lived in the same house their whole lives, and I wasn't part of that. I didn't understand that culture. Granted, I learned to adjust pretty well, and made friends regardless, but always felt sort of left out when people would start talking about memories they had back in elementary school. I didn't have that. All my memories and friends from my childhood were all over the country. I still keep up with my best friends from elementary school via facebook, and I'm so glad. People never believed me when I said I have friends in West Virginia or Florida, or North Carolina. And it frustrated me so much that they just didn't understand.

Anyways, I'm not sure why I have been getting upset lately whenever I see shows like Lifetime's Coming Home, or pictures of military people on Pinterest. I almost cry. I don't know why, but I really miss the military lifestyle sometimes. Or maybe it's the lack of people who understand it that I miss. Everyone says "I understand", or some of my friends in the military now say "I know what you mean now." Now. Not when you were growing up. They don't understand growing up as a child in the military. I mean, none of my friends had to go through seeing their dad see for the Middle East time after time when they were only 7 years old, and not having him there for Christmas or your birthday. Sometimes, not even seeing him for a year. Nobody else had to live in a 2 bedroom apartment with 5 people. Nobody else couldn't not paint their bedroom walls. (that's a big deal, trust me) I just don't know why I'm feeling this way and missing it so much. I guess I miss the pride and being proud of my dad for serving this country. Don't get me wrong, I am very proud he fought and served in the army, and don't regret him getting medically discharged (means he was safe), but I do miss having that military connection. 

Anyways, value your freedom, pray for our soldiers and their families too.